The Infidels Who Kidnapped God
3 min read
The Bible is laden with stories of heroism: David, Elisha, Daniel, and others set precedent for faith, valour and bravery. It is not abnormal to seek these stories when you feel you lack some virtues needed to scale through life’s troubles. Today, I was in search of precisely that.
For no particular reason, I decided to read through the first book of Samuel. And like I had anticipated, I was inspired. What I didn’t foresee, however, was the source of the inspiration — the Philistines, the supposed villains.
For some weird reason, the Jews and Philistines were constantly at war. What they fought over was not explicitly stated most time. Before David took Uriah’s wife to bed, for example, it was stated that it was “at the time when kings go forth to battle” (2 Samuel 11:1). I find that a bit strange. Did these guys have a battle timetable? Maybe their conversations went like this:
King David: “Why don’t we make time for battle?”
King of the Philistines: “Great suggestion. It’s been a boring year. Spring seems nice.”
I digress…
For the aforementioned weird reasons, the Philistines went to war with the Jews. From the story, it seemed like a short battle. Four thousand men were killed, and the Israelites retreated to their camps. Maybe this was what inspired the Dothrakis and White Walkers’ battle scene in Game of Thrones.
Back to the point:
The Israelites, seeing how disadvantaged they were, decided to play their trump card by inviting God to the fight. When the Philistines knew they brought swords to a celestial battle, they panicked.
1 Samuel 4:
7 - And the Philistines were afraid, for they said, God has come into the camp. And they said, Woe unto us! for there has not been such a thing before this.8 - Woe unto us! who shall deliver us out of the hand of these mighty Gods? these are the Gods that struck the Egyptians with all the plagues in the wilderness.
They had every right to be scared. However, what followed blew my mind. I don’t know if they all said the following in unison, or if they were the words of a General:
9 - Be strong, and conduct yourselves like men, O you Philistines, that you be not servants unto the Hebrews, as they have been to you: conduct yourselves like men, and fight.
This is huge. It was like God Himself drew the battle line, and these guys dared to cross it anyway. I paused and let those words sink in: “Conduct yourselves, like men and fight.” Do you know what made this all the more thrilling? They bloody won!
10 - And the Philistines fought, and Israel was defeated, and they fled every man into his tent: and there was a very great slaughter; for there fell of Israel thirty thousand footmen.
They didn’t just win, they kidnapped the ark, the very symbol of God’s presence. It’s safe to say that it later proved to be a bad move, but take nothing away from those men.
After reading the story, I looked at the problems I had; the way things appear to be going South, and said to myself, “Be strong and conduct yourself like a man.” Moreover, unlike the Philistines, God isn’t against me.